ISIS. Ebola. Stock Market. Global Economics. Iran. Israel. Turkey. Russia. China…oh those wily Chinese. I mean, what am I missing? I’m leaving out plenty. A lesbian mayor going after the Texas pulpits in Houston. Ferguson. Global famine the UN warns. A million people dead of Ebola globally by January, 2015 we are warned. Climate Change? The Pentagon isn’t gearing up to fight Islam…it’s gearing up to fight weather. Seriously. Ask Chuck Hagel. Weather. Can you nuke a cold front? Can you cluster bomb a drought?
But don’t worry, y’all…We’ve got, Barack. The smartest man in the room. Hailing from…well, we don’t really know…but let’s just say Hawaii for (bleeps) and giggles. Or is it Kenya? Or Indonesia? Or Chicago? Or is he the love child of Bill Ayers and Jane Fonda? I don’t really know. He doesn’t either I don’t think. The man lost all his life data. His IRS chick did too. He does recall hanging out with the radicals at Harvard, but can’t remember any grades he may or may not have received. He just read his copy of Rules for Radicals like any good Luciferian does, and went about organizing up some community action. He’s currently community organizing the Middle East if you’ve noticed. An army in black pj’s and some rad sneakers, has taken up the business of conquest by white pick up truck and some sharp knives. Nobody can stop them of course. Those knives are really dangerous and those trucks have stealth technology. They stolt, yes, I said stolt, that technology from us while the DHS was busy drawing up plans on how to deal with the enormous domestic security threat of America’s biggest enemy – The Honkey Christian.
So, as you can see…it’s busy season in America. We’ve got a lot on the plate, and I’m not just talking about pumpkin spice meatloaf for dinner. Do I have any solutions? I sure don’t. Well I do…but nobody is going to listen. I won’t even say it. I’m a Honkey Christian. Let’s not make it worse.
I guess we’ll just sit back and watch the show. I think on Friday night, the rider on the Pale Horse, Death, is set to battle Hillary Clinton and the ghost of Gaddafi, who of course Hillary, “came, saw and killed that mofo.” Now he’s her ghostly servant. You can watch it on Pay-Per-View. $59.99. Plus services fees. Enjoy.